Embarking on the journey of an expat mother was like stepping into a world of in depth self-discovery and transformation. After dedicating years to the "corporate life", I fully embraced change by relocating to France with my family for my husband's job. Little did I anticipate all the lessons that awaited me. Surprisingly, having experienced an expat childhood myself, I believed I was well-prepared for our move from São Paulo to Paris, with our little ones – aged just 1 and 2 (almost 3) at the time. I couldn't have been more wrong! Moving as a family brings an entirely different set of dynamics and challenges into play. Today I will share with you the top 5 insights I've gained along this transformative journey.
Lesson 1: Self-Care is Non-Negotiable
As parents, especially in the whirlwind of expat life, we often put our family's needs ahead of our own. It took a while, but I realized that neglecting self-care was counterproductive. My mental, emotional, and physical well-being directly impacted my family's happiness and stability. When I started scheduling time for myself, whether for a hobby, exercise or simply a moment by myself or with friends, I became a stronger base for my family. I learned that prioritizing self-care isn't selfish; it's an act of love not only for myself but for my family.
Lesson 2: The Power of Self-Management
The transition to expat life can be chaotic. My kids had to adapt to new schools, a new language, and new friends. To provide them with a sense of stability, I realized I needed to create structure. Establishing routines for our daily life, from meal times to bedtime, helped us all feel secure. It also allowed me to allocate time for myself, which was crucial for maintaining my sanity in those early days of adjustment.
Lesson 3: Embrace Self-Awareness
The expat journey can be an emotional rollercoaster. It's easy to become overwhelmed by the changes, the uncertainties, and the occasional homesickness. Through this experience, I discovered the importance of self-awareness. I learned to recognize my emotional triggers, understand my strengths and weaknesses, and manage my feelings more effectively. Whether it was practicing mindfulness, doing a training, or seeking support when needed, nurturing self-awareness became a cornerstone of my resilience.
Lesson 4: Cultivate Self-Drive
Leaving my career behind was a significant change. Initially, I felt adrift, as my identity had been closely tied to my profession. However, I soon realized that expat life presented an opportunity to explore new passions and contribute to causes I cared about. By engaging in community and personal projects, I discovered a sense of purpose that transcended the corporate world. This newfound self-drive not only enriched my life but also allowed me to set an inspiring example for my children.
Lesson 5: Seek Self-Balance
Achieving balance in the expat journey is an ongoing process.
It's not about juggling everything perfectly but rather finding equilibrium among the various facets of life. Over time, I've learned to say no when necessary, delegate tasks, and recognize that it's okay not to be supermom. I strive for balance by allocating time to my family, my personal pursuits, and relaxation.
It's about aiming for a life where no one aspect dominates, but where each complements the others.
Through these lessons, I've come to understand that being an expat mother isn't just about nurturing your family's growth; it's also about nurturing your own. Expat mothers are incredibly resilient and strong and we must empower ourselves, just as we empower our families. The journey is a continuous evolution, and while challenges are part of the journey, the rewards are immeasurable.
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